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Yeah but ... by *godsawait:icongodsawait:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Narrative > Open


Adrenaline rush
Metal and honey on my tongue

Arms wrapped around solid flesh
Weaving through a sun-dappled canyon

Crossed legs tucked under a leather jacket
Speeding through dawn-lit Parisian streets

Thoughts vanish into the wind
Life in trust on the back of a bike.
©2008-2009 *godsawait
:icongodsawait:

Author's Comments

Full Title: "Yeah, but ... he's got a Harley"

Comments


love 0 0 joy 2 2 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconyouinventedme:
*YouInventedMe Oct 24, 2008, 1:35:23 PM
Speeding through dawn-lit Parisian streets

Thoughts vanish into the wind

:clap:


xo!
:icongodsawait:
*godsawait Oct 24, 2008, 1:58:40 PM
:) Thanks.

--
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." Bukowski
:iconlucid-state:
~lucid-state Oct 24, 2008, 7:05:28 PM
Again, you've created a flawlessly lucid moment in time. The fleeting glimpses of things that you describe are just enough to cause my mind to fill in the rest. It's almost like I can breathe the words you've put down!

--
wide-eyed and hopeful
wide-eyed and hopefully wild
:icongodsawait:
*godsawait Oct 25, 2008, 6:21:26 PM
Wow - that is perhaps the kindest comment I've received on DA. Thank you so much ... :heart: In this case the subject matter helps, I'm sure - it's easy to lose your breath going 100 miles/hour. :)

--
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." Bukowski
:iconlucid-state:
~lucid-state Oct 25, 2008, 7:20:07 PM
It takes talent to refrain from saying too much in poetry. I find some of the most striking pieces say very little, which is why I commented on my admiration of how you let the reader conjure up the rest for themselves. It is something I could never master, and I marvel at the talent I see here.

--
wide-eyed and hopeful
wide-eyed and hopefully wild
:icongodsawait:
*godsawait Oct 27, 2008, 6:41:11 AM
:hug: Thanks. I try to say very little in general ... although that's mainly because I'm shy.

I definitely agree with you on the few words thing .. my favorite poets on DA write pieces that let me read them, think, and take the words away with me for the rest of the day.

--
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." Bukowski
:iconamy--louise:
~Amy--Louise Oct 30, 2008, 8:14:33 AM
That metallic taste is how one of my guides talks to me . . .

--
"To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.":frail:
:icongodsawait:
*godsawait Oct 30, 2008, 9:52:34 AM
? Tell me more about this ... please ...

--
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." Bukowski
:iconamy--louise:
~Amy--Louise Oct 30, 2008, 10:02:08 AM
You mentioned the metal honey taste. What did you mean?

--
"To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.":frail:
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